speed down the highway from home to work and back. You have to slow down, step
out of your comfort zone and really put some effort toward meeting people in
order to make the dating scene seem less like a torture chamber and more like
the fun it is meant to be.
But once you have an exciting prospect there is a whole new set of dilemmas. And
delights. If you are like most people when you find an interesting person to
date, a billion questions tramp across your mind. Should I act as interested as
I truly am? Should I try to remain aloof? Will it scare him or her away if I
bare my soul in the first ten minutes? Should I pace myself and introduce my
passions slowly?
Since there are plenty of dating books but no real manual out there, these will
continue to be legitimate and timeless questions. Unfortunately the answer to
all of them is simply this: you have to trust your instincts with most things
when it comes to dating.
However there are a few questionable aspects of the dating scene that you can
eliminate simply by setting a few subtle boundaries. To insure a comfortable
beginning and attempt a peaceful middle while leaning toward a happily ever
after to any date (especially the first date) you must have a strategy. Most
people will agree the first date is the most awkward simply due to the fact you
don't really know what to anticipate. That is also the great fun of first dates.
Taking the guesswork out of one part of the first date trauma (or drama
depending) it is a great idea to simplify that first “date” by meeting for
coffee during the early evening or mid day. Not only does that give you an
opportunity to escape in as little as fifteen minutes if the experience is
perfectly dreadful, it allows the date to last as long as it needs to if things
are rolling along nicely. And caffeine can be as effective as alcohol when it
comes to loosening tongues and inhibitions!
One certain way of enjoying your first date is by being honest and attentive. If
rejection is the one thing all humans fear the most, acceptance has to be the
one thing everyone longs to experience. Be kind, courteous and respectful even
if you don't feel the date is going the way you wanted it to go. Sometimes the
person who does not fit our instant criteria is actually a genuine compatible
match for us.